Import/Export

Depending on what happens monday when I go to have a chat with the people at school I may or may not be staying.

see, they have these rules for students, expensive rules. Which are a totally different subject, of course.

Well, in order to stay I have to pay my fees for this semester, get a receipt, and wait a day. Then I can get a bank statement (saying I have about 14kNZ sitting in my account) and get another receipt for $120 (yep, visa fees went up. Again.) and take that stuff, plus this whole other list of stuff I need (photos and applications and records and who knows what else) to the immigration desk on campus 10 days before my visa runs out, so they can get it renewed for me.

So I need to take receipts for things I haven't paid yet (still no loans) and bank statements with money I don't have, and the 120 for the fee, to this desk. Last wednesday.

Now, some time next week I'll have *some* money. But it won't be 24kNZ. Not even close to that. My stafford may or may not get here by friday, but even if it does, the school won't admit to having it for a week. I don't know if this is normal for universities, but it's honestly the only place I've ever heard of holding checks (cashed in the school's account the whole time) for a week before crediting the account.

But since, as I said, they hold those checks for a week, my account won't show even partial payment before friday (also known as the day before my visa runs out).

now yes, at least some of this is my fault. After all, I could have borrowed a huge-er pile of cash at crazy rates. I could have pestered the loan company to let me apply for my private loan earlier. Heck, I could have put it all on a credit card somewhere.

But I didn't do any of that. And so now if I don't get an extension (and I'm really not holding out any great hope) I have to leave.

Funny thing is, I might just go anyway. Anyone who's actually read the more coherent posts in here- the school related ones, anyway- will realise that I'm really not getting anywhere, except maybe in debt.

For comparison, what I've borrowed (and spent) in the last year would have been enough to travel on for at least 2 years. The tuition alone was enough for at least one really good year.

I am, oddly, not comfortable here. I don't know if it's the out there racism that I keep running into this last 6 months or so, or the way people here manage to be some of the best travelled xenophobes I've ever met. Or maybe it's just that I miss doritos. It could be how most of the local students think a great night hanging out with friends starts with a bottle of vodka each and ends with puking.

Or maybe I just want to go home because I know there is no way I'll actually study here. I have no motivation. The better I do, after all, the longer I have to stay. Call me commitment phobic.

So, probably wednesday or thursday I'll be taking off for home.

which means that this weekend I'm cleaning and pre-packing and doing laundry. I don't want to think about what else I have to do- who I need to see on monday, finding tickets, getting some/ any furniture for when I move back, getting rid of my bed here, telling the flatmates I'm taking off, and who knows what else.

Blegh.

I want my mommy.

I know- so mature.

j.